Amy Marsh, Sexologist & Hypnotist

Supporting Your Sexual Human Rights & Quest for Pleasure

Desire

One of the most difficult problems faced by intimate partners is that of “desire discrepancy” – a situation where one person wants more physical sex, and the other person wants less (or sometimes doesn’t want physical sex at all).

There may be many factors complicating matters: feeling out of touch with your own eroticism; partner dynamics, including resentments; medical issues (get a check-up!); self-esteem and body image; the limitations experienced by an ill, disabled, or aging body; hormones; or a need to allow safe exploration of other erotic options–for example, different kinds of touch or sexual expressions. While I can’t address medical issues, I can help tease out the other factors that affect desire, and assist with sex- and pleasure-positive strategies to support you in your quest for a happier, more fullfilling sex life.

A Word About Asexuality

Some people who have little or no desire for sexual interactions may be asexual, demisexual, or one of the other variations (there are many). Asexuality has nothing to do with “low hormones” or “just not finding the right sex partner.” For some people, a lack of interest (or a very low interest) in sexual contact is a true orientation, an authentic part of a person’s nature. Some people may desire romantic and affectionate relationships, some people may not. Some people may engage in sex sometimes, but not often. It is very individual. However if a person who desires sexual contact is paired with an asexual person, this may cause some difficulties in the relationship. Adult sex ed and counseling may be helpful.

For more information please go to AVEN-the Asexuality and Visibility Education Network. The AVEN General FAQ is a good place to start. This is a complex topic and asexual people deserve support.

Contact dr.amymarshsexologist at gmail.com
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